Friday, February 8, 2008

Rules of RAISING mY cHILDREN

I am a saver of sentimental things. I have these rules, still saved on my computer, transferred from various, many computers over the last 8 years. Rules, I, obsessive-compulsive first-time mother, left for my Nanny when I went back to work after my son was born.
My Nanny, whom I may add, was my favorite 1st cousin, super-intelligent, also "slightly"obsessive compulsive, wonderfully talented child-care provider.
Why she accepted the job as nanny for a crazy woman is beyond me.

This is the actual document I printed and hung on the fridge for her, to just to be helpful.

(No joke here.)(Comments added later in Blue.)


Daily Schedule for BabyScott
August 1999


Washing/Sterilizing bottles:
Look in Baby’s room, living room and my room for empty bottles from the night. (Bottles are the cylindrical clear objects on the counter)
As you use a bottle, rinse with hot water and put in big plastic pan of soapy water.
Sterilize bottles in the morning and make up all bottles for the day using bottled, purified water.
Boil bottles in big pan, nipples and lids in small one for 5 minutes.
Pour on towel. Let cool.
Make 5 ounce formula bottles. 5 oz water--- 2 1/2 oz powder.
Shake 30 times with bottle lid on and refrigerate. (Can you believe I actually said 30 times???)
In small bottles, fill half with juice and half with water. There are 3 small ones.

Schedule:
Normally, Baby takes a bottle between 5 and 6 a.m. and then sleeps until 9am.
Between 9 and 9:30, Baby will take a bottle- usually the whole 5 ounces.
Burp at 2 1/2 oz then again at the end.
He will usually go play for awhile, and go to sleep.
From here, the schedule varies according to sleep but is usually close to every 2 hours.
Let him have a bottle only if it has been at least 2 hours.
If he cries for a bottle before 2 hours, give him a little juice. Not a bottle full, just may be 2 oz.
He usually drinks 2 juice bottles in a day, a little less. ( Nanny clarified my remarks as to between 6-12 sips of juice are allowed between formula, to be tallied on a notepad by the phone.)
If he cries and it is NOT time to eat:
Try the pacifier first. (In the bin labeled Pacifiers)
Try talking, bouncing or playing.
Try changing him- HE LOVES the changing table.
Try juice.
Try rocking/with pacifier/singing.
Try sitting him up in the corner of the couch---be careful, he can slide off.
Try Milicon drops if he has a tummy ache.
Try laying him on a palette with the big bird toys. (Nanny added later that they are in the bin labeled "BIG BIRD TOYS" inside the bin labeled "TOYS" inside the bin labeled "BINS")
Try his bed and the mobile.
Try anything else!!!
Unless he is going to sleep---talk to him all the time!


Since that time, I had a second child.

And My Nanny had compose the rules for the second one as a companion for the 1st-
since when she cared for my baby girl,
I obviously just stopped in the driveway
and pushed her out the door.

Sally Instructions 2004

If there is powder in her bag, feed her. Mix a few pinches of it with water- tap, bath toilet, whatever.

Try to leave the same diaper on all day. Those things are expensive.

If she cries, give her a pacifier or something that will fit in her mouth and put here somewhere out of the way.

Don't talk to her too much. We don't want her to get used to too much human interaction.

My how time changes you.

My baby girl, I do love you. My son, I do apologize for my neurosis and love you as well.

My Nanny, I thank you for loving my kids and not saying I was crazy, at least to my face.

Although, I do not know who will be most mentally scarred by my rules or lack of..........Baby #1 or baby #2.

4 comments:

Leigh said...

great post. amazingly it all turned out ok, huh? That is so sos so funny. and number one so sounds like my friend courtney, who you will meet today at the art class. we call her "high may" (maintance)
Her kids (twins) are both 7. I think she still floows list 1. LOL> I so love her!

Kalynne Pudner said...

Cute post! I should steal the idea. In fact, I'm going to steal it (with a link to yours); is that ok?

Wait -- does it count as "stealing" if I ask your permission? Hmm.

Thanks for stopping by my blog, and thanks especially for the buy-your-own-dang-socks idea!

--"The Philosopher-Mom"

Parisian at Heart said...

That is so funny. I am sure I will create a similar list when I have kids.

I hope you got my email. Have a great weekend!

Leigh said...

Wasnt court just the funniest. she cracks me up!